The notes app on my phone was a security blanket for me in the first few years of grief. I noticed in her death that the kind, sweet coaching voice I have in my head is me mimicking my mother’s voice. Maybe it is her voice? Who knows? It’s definitely in there!
Anything my Mom used to say would pop up in my head and the notes app was the place I dumped all of those things. It was also a nice way to stay connected to my brothers who would text me things to add to the list.
In April of 2020 when we were all home due to a pandemic, I used the 100-day art challenge (commit to DOING an art project 100 days straight) to letter Things My Mom Used to Say iPad Pro in Procreate.
The pandemic stirred up a lot of grief (for everyone!) and I found it to be a great way to keep her spirit close when I needed her. For 100 days I embodied my Mom.
When I finished in July, I set out to make a book with all the sayings. I made the book through Blurb and worked on putting it together in the evenings. In order to stay motivated, I gave myself the goal to have this book done at least a month before Christmas so I could get it printed and gift copies to my family members and I did it! Life works better when I have due dates.
Here are some of my favorites:
The book turned out to be 106 pages in total. At the end of it, I made a little photo montage and did a word mapping of my Mom so I would never forget what made up her spirit.
Here’s the cover again:
She had quite a sense of humor…
When someone dies, there’s this rush to get things done with obituaries, programs, funerals, services, etc. and it’s absolutely exhausting. I didn’t have the energy to come up with a photo collage and video for my Mom’s funeral service and felt a little bit guilty about that as the person left being the family historian/the keeper of all the photos. I didn’t make this book until I was 3 years into my grief.
Sometimes it takes a lot of wobbly living for it to really sink in how much a special person is missed. Perspective is an incredible gift even though it sometimes comes with a lot of pain and heartache. You don’t really understand what you have until it’s gone.
I am glad I didn’t rush through processing the loss of her. I would have never known how important my art practice is key to my hope and growth. She always encouraged that in me.
This project of lettering what she said reminded me of how consistency was one of my Mom’s main values. She taught me that repetition is the mother of skill…
She also taught me the importance of doing something productive with my feelings.
I later made a Mom Yourself Peptalk postcard pack to share some of my favorites of her sayings.
Mother’s Day or any day/holiday for that matter can bring up a whole set of feelings to process. My hope is that you take a moment and connect with the voice of a mother (you had/needed/need) within you.
What are some of the things she’d say when you need her the most?
How can you keep that voice close as you learn how to reparent yourself?
How can you be productive with your feelings?
You can see more of her sayings on the hashtag- #100thingsMomusedtosay
More of my hand-lettering work can be found on my Instagram. Follow
Hi Tracy! I have been reading your posts about your mother and can I just say, they are all not only beautiful and well-written, but also informative, funny, touching, and so heart felt that it makes everyone want to reach out to their own mom and hug them tight. Reading about this incredibly thoughtful gift you made in memory of your mother has reminded me of a video I thought you might like. (Please excuse the title, I promise with all my heart, I recommend this video with love and laughter this weekend.) From one artistic lady with a wicked sense of humor to another, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. Please keep writing and showcasing your amazing art on here. It inspires and overwhelms everyone in the best way more than you will ever know. Letters Live: https://youtu.be/qhczIF4lDAk